Imagine that you have just returned from a date with a very nice man. He was charming, had a great sense of humor, and acted like he actually cared about you. The whole evening you had a wonderful conversation and laughed, but you still can’t shake the feeling that something is wrong, that it’s all too good to be true.
Maybe it was because he was flirting with the waitress who served you? Or met an acquaintance in a bar who spoke to him too frivolously? Is it jealousy – or is there something really fishy here? Are you special – or is he the same way with all other women?
Questions like these may be completely reasonable and indicate that you are dealing with a womanizer.
Who can be called a womanizer
A womanizer is a man who can win the affections of many women, but is not going to commit himself seriously to any of them. More often than not, he is charismatic and flirts on a professional level.
Usually a womanizer will say or do something that he doesn’t actually believe just to get attention or even win the heart of a woman. He enjoys the game itself rather than its result.
Where can you meet a womanizer?
Men of this type feel great on dating sites and apps. Thanks to the growing popularity of services, it is becoming much easier for womanizers to communicate and go on dates with more women. They can send the same pick-up lines and get the approval and recognition they need. Sometimes it comes to the point that women create groups on social networks to figure out if they are dating the same person.
At the same time, of course, a womanizer can be found anywhere – in a bar, at an exhibition, in a park. Such men are usually open to dating in any setting.
Why do people become womanizers?
From a psychological point of view, there may be different reasons for this behavior. For example:
- Problems with self-esteem. Numerous dates for womanizers are a way to increase self-esteem and feel important by receiving confirmation from the outside.
- Lack of success. Some men focus on career and wealth, but do not achieve their goals. They feel they can’t do much for relationships and don’t find much benefit in them, so they reject women before they get to know them.
- Objectification of women. Womanizers see them solely as an opportunity to satisfy their needs and use relationships only to increase their status and stroke their ego.
However, in principle, there is no universal psychological explanation for any behavior, and the motives that drive womanizers are endless. Some people try to explore different facets of their personality by entering into short-term relationships, while others are afraid of the vulnerability associated with serious obligations to a partner, and thus they avoid it.
How to understand that you have fallen in love with a womanizer
A person who is truly interested in a relationship differs from a womanizer in that he behaves in a way that makes you feel safe and appreciated. He will do what he promises and will stay in touch all the time, rather than responding to messages every now and then or going into the shadows for long periods of time.
In addition, a man who is truly in love will strive for real intimacy. He’ll ask you more personal questions and tell you more about himself, and have more thoughtful conversations that go beyond superficial flirting.
Unfortunately, some men are masters at faking genuine interest. However, time always puts everything in its place. Therefore, it is important not to rush, but to gradually get to know each other. Any mask will fall off sooner or later, and a person will show his true intentions.
Try to listen rather than talk. Try to find out details about the person’s past and his plans for the future, as well as how his relationships with women have developed in the past. This way you will collect more pieces of the puzzle and create a more detailed portrait of the man.
Is it worth dating a womanizer?
It all depends on what you want from the relationship. If you are sure that you are dealing with a womanizer, you need to decide how much he satisfies your needs. Perhaps you are having fun with him and you feel more confident next to him, so you don’t want to cut off communication. But you need to understand that the relationship is unlikely to go beyond casual meetings.
What to do if you constantly come across womanizers
To begin with, it may be helpful to take a step back and listen to your feelings. The emotions you experience can help you find the right path.
When you meet someone new and are absolutely delighted, it’s natural to feel butterflies in your stomach. But if you then feel anxious and endlessly frustrated because you don’t know when he’ll show up next, that’s a warning sign.
Before you go on your next date, define your personal boundaries and decide what is comfortable for you and what is not. To make it easier to stick to your decision, you can tell everything directly to a potential partner, write it down, or discuss it with a friend.
Finding your loved one can be an emotional rollercoaster. The most important thing is to know yourself, understand what you are looking for, and not change your priorities.
If you want someone who is easy and fun to be with, it’s unrealistic to expect dating to turn into a serious relationship. And if you want someone with whom you want to share your life for a long time, you need to clearly understand your expectations and intentions and learn to notice signs that the beginning of a relationship with them does not match.