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1. Be clear about what you want to change
Just say: “I want to get rid of bad habits, I have a lot of them!” – not enough. You need to understand what behavior you want to change. For example, do not throw your shoes in the hallway, but carefully place them on the shelf. Eat not in front of the TV, but at the table. Don’t sit at home in the evenings, but go for a run. Define such specific actions, and it will be easier for you to work with them.
2. Find triggers for bad habits
Habits are essentially behavioral loops that we repeat automatically. Some signal makes us want to perform a certain action, and for it we receive a reward. And so again and again. Most often, the signal is one of the following:
- place;
- time;
- emotional condition;
- actions of other people;
- previous action.
Every time you repeat a bad habit, think about these five points and write down the results. Eventually, you will begin to notice general trends and understand what exactly is causing the habit. After this, try to eliminate the trigger or replace the unwanted action with a new one.
3. Fine yourself
Set aside some money every time you take an action that you want to give up. Let the bad habit bring additional losses. For example, if you are too lazy to go to training, put 200 rubles in a special jar or into a separate account. You can assign different penalties for different habits depending on the criticality of each. If you want to stop impulsive spending, save the same amount that you spent on an unnecessary item.
To make it easier, enlist the support of friends and family. Let them remind you that you have to pay a fine if they notice you have a bad habit. You might even agree to give a small amount to them rather than saving it for yourself. This will be additional motivation.
4. Introduce changes gradually
Don’t try to change completely in one day: it’s impossible. Be patient. Focus on one habit and think about the incremental small steps you will take.
For example, you want to reduce the amount of junk food in your diet. If you try to completely change your diet at once, you won’t succeed. Instead, start putting less sugar in your food or swap the creamer in your coffee for skim milk. When it starts to come easy to you, add new small steps. Gradually they will lead to big changes.
5. Analyze the habit before you take action.
Of course, you can’t wait to break your bad habit. But instead of rushing into battle right away, analyze it carefully. Give yourself a month to do this. Make a list of reasons why you want to give it up. Make a note every time you perform an unwanted action. This way you will better understand what causes this habit and how to fight it.
6. Set reminders
Even if you are now enthusiastic about breaking the habit, at some point you will want to return to it. For example, when you are tired or upset about something. And sometimes you may simply forget about your decision.
Let’s say you promised yourself to drink only two glasses of wine when you get together with friends. But it’s easy to forget about this once you’re in a bar. In such cases, set yourself reminders in your phone. Rest assured, you will thank yourself for this in the future.
7. Find a meaningful reason
Everyone knows that smoking and eating fast food is harmful to health. But this knowledge itself is usually not enough to get rid of a bad habit. Therefore, it is important to find reasons that are meaningful to you personally. For example, quit smoking in order to seriously take up running or not quarrel with family members because of an unpleasant smell. Stop eating sweets to look better or spend less money.
8. Change something in the environment
If you do something in the same place for a long time, the environment itself turns into a trigger. Often we don’t even notice it. For example, at work you always go out to smoke in the office parking lot. The place becomes your trigger – a signal to take out cigarettes and a lighter. Now you do it without thinking. To stop, try to change something in your usual conditions.
Follow this up with the 20 second rule. Make it so that it takes 20 seconds longer to start a habitual action. For example, put sweets in the far corner of the cupboard so that they are not easy to reach. And put healthy foods in a visible place. When you want a snack, you take what is closest.
9. Train yourself to think differently about your habits
Even if we hate some habit and scold ourselves for smoking or biting our nails, we still continue to do it. This is how we get a feeling of satisfaction, a certain psychological reward.
Watch your thoughts. Remind yourself of the negative aspects of a habit every time you think about its benefits. For example, when you thought: “I’m so sad, now I’ll eat a cake and I’ll feel better,” immediately tell yourself: “Now I’ll eat a cake and gain excess weight, and even increase the risk of diabetes.”
Reframe your thoughts to remind yourself of the negative aspects of the habit. Do this every time you notice that you are thinking about its advantages.
10. Develop an “if-then” plan
It will help you break the loop and replace the bad habit with another action. Write down what you will do when you want to return to it: “If I find myself in X situation, I will do Y.” In this case, X is a signal that makes you want to perform a habitual action, and Y is your new behavior. For example: “If I go to a bar with friends, I will order a non-alcoholic cocktail.”
The plan should be simple so that switching to it does not require a lot of effort from you. At first, you will sometimes miss the signal or return to the old pattern of behavior – this is natural. But gradually a new loop will form, and the bad habit will remain a thing of the past.